Talk of crowning Jammeh king, arises from the degeneration of our politics
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By Mathew K Jallow, Associate Editor
Moveover King Musa Molloh. Moveover Burr Saloum. Moveover Mansa Musa. There is a new king is town; His Royal Highness, His Excellency, King, Professor, Doctor, Shiek, Alhagi Yahya AJJ Jammeh, conqueror of The Gambia. First, they wanted him to declare a one-party state; now they want him crowned King. King of The Gambia that is. No, you are not dreaming. It is happening. We are dealing here with Yahya Jammeh; remember! Nothing is out of the realm of possibility, no matter how absurd or outlandish. That is the measure of his vanity, his intelligence or better still, his absolute stupidity. In case anyone is tempted to dismiss the news of the impending coronation as mere buffoonery, better think again. For any other sane person, such a crazy idea might amount to nothing more than a bad joke. Not so Yahya AJJ Jammeh, a man who revels in the cantankerous, and prides in the whimsical allure of the world of make-belief; a buffoon whose ubiquitous indulgence in phantasmagoria personifies his dichotomous characteristics of insanity and craziness. And if you wander who conceived and gave weight to this “genius” idea, then wander no more. It is a gathering of eclectic colonial era relics, whose yesteryear institution, has long out-lived its usefulness. They are our district chiefs. And Gambians are mad as hell at the thought of this monumental exhibition of utter irrationality, and want the heads of the chiefs, with their brains and all, on a silver platter. But more than just that, they are fretting, seething and snarling; wandering if this circus is true or a mere extrapolation of the chiefs’ infantile giddiness or manifestations of their lugubrious fanaticism. While we mourn or ridicule the avalanche of chicanery coming out of The Gambia, it is clear that Yahya Jammeh’s deleterious grandiosity and fatuous abomination, has long reached its mortifying climax. Forget for one moment the numerous murders, forget the executions, forget the raiding and looting of our national coffers, and forget the insanity swirling around our politics, we as a country are once again descending into a new dimension of ungodly and frenetic reality. Yahya Jammeh’s kingship flap is axiomatic of his entanglement with absurdity; the macabre inauguration of one more of his infinite social and political aberrations that Gambians have to contend with and endure, not by their own choice, but by Jammeh’s force of will and our history of collective differentiality to his abusive authority. And Fatou Jaw-Manneh, in another masterpiece, captured the essence of this moment when she declared “Jammeh is already King; all that we need to do is take a deep breath and let him mount the tiara.” And I could not agree more. So bring out the halams, the nyanyeji, the sabaros, the bukarabus and the gewels, and King Yahya Jammeh’s subjects, and let this party begin.
Yahya Jammeh’s coronation could indeed be a no-brainer given the extraordinary way he has escaped any retaliatory measures for his egregious acts of brutality and uncaring political showmanship over the past decade and half. Ever since news of Yahya Jammeh’s possible coronation hit the airwaves, many skeptics are under no illusion that this harrowing scenario is being puppeteered and kept alive by Jammeh himself, and his history of irreverent behavior, makes it hard to argue against this logical premise. Given the political, legal and Constitutional ramifications of a possible Jammeh coronation, silly and downright stupid as it may sound in the imperial realm of sanity, it is absolutely not a laughing matter. And Yahya Jammeh’s curriculum vitae, which showcases his voracious appetite for the ridiculous and lunatic penchant for the frivolous and the dramatic, proves this right. What are we to do? The same thing we have always done; nothing! For despite Jammeh’s daring malfeasances spanning a decade and half and his frequent recidivism to a life of crime, there is not much we can do if Yahya Jammeh decides to crown himself King. And rather than agonize over a situation no one can neither influence nor change, Gambians should recapitulate and let Yahya Jammeh’s coronation, inevitable as it may appear, have its moment of glory in the sun. Jammeh coronation will bring another incredibly hilarious dimension of reality to an enigmatic aberration that cries out for attention. The Royal Jammeh family, consisting of the King with long titles, Queens, First and Second ladies, Zeinab and Alima, Princess Mariam, the heir King in waiting, Prince Mohammed, and Her Royal Highness, King Mother, Asombo Bojang, by virtue of King Jammeh’s expanded fortunes, stand to enjoy the spoils of war expropriated from the vanquished; we the fellow citizens. The pomp and entertainment galore of the coronation itself, with members of the Royal family dapperly dressed in exquisite and resplendence African garb, will only serve as a matter of formality, since as FJM indicated in her excellent article, Jammeh already enjoys all the powers and perks exclusive to a king or emperor. The silly talk of crowing Jammeh king, arises from the degeneration of our politics, and is demonstrative of the exodus of sanity, the imperceptible decay of our politics and the indignant irrelevance of our political establishment. Leaders of our political parties have become mere itinerant snake oils salesmen in need of political salvation. The mortifying agony over Yahya Jammeh’s possible coronation as King, is a clear indication of the inherent weakness in what is left of our structural democracy. Until the political establishment can articulate consistent and reliable methods of fighting back Jammeh’s political demons, ridiculous stories such as Jammeh’s coronation as King, will manifest themselves as a demonstration of the uncertainty in our political system and the political standing of our glorified and directionless opposition. But, maybe soon we will be redeemed from our agony when Yahya Jammeh establishes his monarchy. Then with a collective shy of relief, we will cry out “good riddance” to our political parties and their leaders, and instead, bow “Hail to His Royal Highness, His Excellency, King, Professor, Doctor, Shiek, Alhagi Yahya AJJ Jammeh, conqueror of The Gambia. How insanely ridiculous this sounds!!!